Dear Brothers and Sisters in my Church Family,
Every Sunday morning as I look around the church, I thank God for each one of you. Thankful that you are there, whether we talk or wave or not, you encourage me by being there. I’d like to share some of my thoughts about being a part of our church with you.
I’ve attended this church most of my 68 years. I remember those who served in Sunday School, VBS, Youth Group, choir, Ladies’ Missionary Fellowship, Youth Outreach; oh, so many ways. These bring joyful memories to me.
However, there is one thing I remember which brings sorrow. The groups of people who left the church, commonly called a church split.
I have a friend who has lost a daughter. Not due to death, but because her child walked away from the family. For over a decade there has been no communication. Even as her father was fighting a losing battle with cancer, she refused to call. Her siblings begged her to call. He died never hearing her voice again. Why does a person walk away from her family like that?
Over forty years ago, my husband walked away from his family – his wife, 4-year-old daughter, and a daughter yet to be born in 5 months. What causes a person to walk away from their family?
How severe does a disagreement have to be to walk away from your church family? I understand that there are times when you feel God moving you to a different community and a different church; however, we can, as a family, help you as you move on, rejoicing that you’ve found a new job, new home, or a new ministry. There have been times when friends have left, but have shared it with me beforehand, so that I could pray with them as they sought the Lord’s will. How I appreciate them.
However, many people leave the church because of non-doctrinal disagreements and they do not understand how it affects the ones who stay behind. We feel that they have walked away from the family. Tears flow as minds race to understand why a disagreement cannot be resolved between people who all love God our Father. We wonder what could have been done to avoid this result. We struggle to forgive them, thinking that they have rejected us rather than try to resolve the disagreement.
We ask God to help us give grace when we see them in social events. We remember that they have cut us out of their lives and grieve because of the loss. We wonder if they ever really were friends. We pray that God will help us forgive them, even if they never understand the sorrow and pain they inflicted.
Even as I write this, tears still flow, and I wonder what we can do to stop people from leaving their church family for what they consider to be a better church. How do we learn commitment to our church family – through good times and hard times – through disagreements and discussions?
Now that I am retired, several people have asked if I will be moving to be closer to family. I love my kids and grandkids, but when I think about leaving the town where I grew up and have lived most of my life, the foremost reason to stay is my church family. Certain people come to mind who have prayed for me, encouraged me, cared for me, and it hurts to think of leaving them. As I come to know each of you more each week, I know I will soon feel the same about leaving you.
I hope we have many years living and serving our Father together,
Grace and peace.
Taking it Further:
What is your commitment to your church? Are you developing relationships which show strong family ties?
