In our rural district hunting, gathering, and gardening are popular for entertainment and economic value. We haven’t given hunting a fair shot yet, but with a garden plot in the backyard our thumbs are turning greener every year. We are learning the seasonal schedule for berry picking too. Last summer we were expecting our third child in June, a busy time of year for the farmer. To ease my anxiety my husband and I decided we would limit our planting to tomatoes and root vegetables. Since frozen strawberries supplied us all throughout the winter, I’d go picking at the local fruit farm, if possible. And although wild blueberries are free, they are tedious and time-consuming to pick; I would have to relinquish the tasty fruit in my oatmeal for a less frenzied summer and a new child (obviously better)!
Joel Benjamin arrived 14 days late on June 30th. A friend offered to pick strawberries for me and then agreed to accompany me when I had the (hysterical) idea to go myself on the last day of the season. With my three children in tow, Heidi and I made it to the patch at 8:00am before picking closed. We really had a great time at the farm that morning. I loved the visits with friends across the rows. My preschooler enjoyed finding and playing with friends and geese. And, miraculously, Joel slept the longest morning stretch he had ever slept in his 10-day old life! As I was examining my last buckets, my little guy started stirring in the stroller, giving me those initial cues that his nap was over and things would get ugly if I didn’t nurse him promptly. Instead of heeding my friend’s advice to wrap up the picking and tend to my baby, I ignored my infant’s grunts and scrambled to do as much picking to fill every last gap in my pails. (I was paying per pail!) It took Heidi firmly telling me to stop already for me to see her point that I was being irresponsible.
I was a little embarrassed in the moment for greedily caring so much about picking my berries until the last second—and that it was so obvious! I was being irrational and selfish. I had blessings right in front of me: juicy red fruit, a friend to help, a healthy, sleeping baby. But in the moment I was missing it. It wasn’t enough. Instead of having a thankful heart towards the Lord for His gifts I was consumed with wanting more. I needed to heap my bucket a little fuller.
One of my tendencies—as seen here—is to take matters into my own hands. In the face of a challenge or conflict or problem I push further and harder. My go-getter attitude can expose my lack of trust in God and my desire for things to happen my way with my timing.
In the Sermon on the Mount Jesus says our heavenly Father’s care and provision for the birds and flowers demonstrates His greater love for us (Matthew 6:25-34 cf. Luke 12:22-31 ). Yet His audience—us included—needs the specific, repeated reminder to not be anxious about those things that we need in life (v25, 27, 28, 31, 34).
Our needs are real. God knows better than we do that our requirements extend beyond any bird or lily. And patience—specifically, waiting on God—is hard. Anxiety leads us to do and feel many things. At times we may want to take matters into our own hands or give up on God altogether, lacking faith that He has any ability or intention to provide. Every person experiences that place of waiting or lacking. We have physical, relational, emotional, and spiritual yearnings and needs. The pastor’s wife and her family know this in a unique way. Family life, vocation, and financial provision are intertwined with the beautiful and messy dynamics of serving in and with a local church. Our small-town congregations include our faithful co-labourers, our dearest friends, along with exhausting and painful relationships. We have a front row seat to many needs and experience a wide variety of our own.
So why shouldn’t we worry about our needs? Jesus makes it clear that our worrying does not accomplish anything. It doesn’t add a single hour to our life (6:27). Also, today has enough worries without borrowing tomorrow’s problems (6:34b). More comforting, God sees, and cares and provides for His children.
What do we do instead of worrying?
Our better aim is to seek first His kingdom. Jesus has a broader goal and vision that extends beyond our life’s needs. Jesus said, “Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing?” (6:25b) and “For the Gentiles seek after [what to drink and wear], and your heavenly Father knows that you need them all. But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you” (6:32-33).
A few weeks later God rounded out my lesson from the strawberry patch: in the span of a few days three different people from church dropped off containers and bags of wild blueberries for us. It was so out of the blue we chuckled at how many blueberries we had. With no effort of my own we had accumulated more than I would have been able to pick! In my strawberry patch moment I really did think that I was caring for my family. I was doing my best by striving to stock our freezer and even jumping over hurdles to get there. (But figurative hurdles of course. Ten days postpartum has no mom jumping anything!) I am in awe of God’s kindness in teaching me to wait on Him—a hard lesson—through blessing me. I did not specifically ask God for blueberries and we definitely didn’t need or deserve them, but He freely provided them anyway. It really is humbling that God sees and cares for us even as our efforts to trust Him are mixed with anxiety and striving and doubt.
Honestly, church life for my husband and me is not easy at the moment. Conflicting opinions and convictions have brought new challenges to us. There is a whole new meaning to patient trust in the Lord that extends beyond berries.
Can we wait on Jehovah-jireh to provide reconciliation and forgiveness? Provide wisdom and direction? Provide strength to bear the hardships and heartaches? Provide friendships and family harmony? Provide grace to love?
Our heavenly Father is not asking any of us to ignore or deny our needs. He invites us to see how He has been with us through it all. In faith we believe that today He is providing. In patience we trust that future needs will be met when we seek His righteousness first. With Him we lack no provision big or small.
From strawberries to blueberries, this article was a great thesis on patience and God’s provision. Thanks for sharing!!