For me, the beauty of the Flowers ministry has been the privilege of meeting so many pastors’ wives from so many places in North America. Though most of these women I’ve never met in person, I feel like I already know them as I hear their hearts for God and ministry through their writings. Stacey Weeks is one of those women.
She heard about us through another pastor’s wife and since has become a part of our team as a guest writer and speaker. Though not in small-town ministry currently, (she and her husband serve at Harvest Bible Chapel in Brantford, Ontario, Canada), she started out in ministry as a rural pastor’s wife with Village Missions.
We’re excited to have her share her story with us, especially because you will be getting to know her more through our next reading challenge which we have planned for fall 2018 on our Flowers Facebook Community Group with Stacey and her book “Glorious Surrender”. Watch for more information on that in the fall.
- Where did you grow up? How did where you grew up contribute to preparing you for life in small-town pastoral ministry?
Answer: I grew up in Chatham, Ontario. It is a small city (as far as cities go), but it was much larger than the first church in which my husband served as the pastor. That tiny village contained about 300 people.
- Where have you served in ministry? Can you describe the particular culture in those areas and how that affected your ministry there?
Answer: We’ve been all over the place following the Lord! Our first ministry was a tiny village of 300 people in southern Ontario. We served there through Village Missions. Almost everyone was related in that village, which made ministry both easier and more difficult. Most of our ministry “firsts” happened there. First baby dedication, first baptisms, first funeral, first hurts absorbed from people we loved, first time we let people down. The Lord used those years tremendously to grow us and stretch us in unimaginable ways. This was the place where our rose-colored-ministry-glasses came off and we questioned our calling. We stayed about 5 years, and then my husband returned to seminary to obtain his Master’s degree.
We moved to Moose Jaw, Saskatchewan, where we visited many churches before settling on a church family. Kevin was not on staff, so we experienced what visitors feel, and it opened our eyes to the MANY things a church family must do to make visitors feel welcome.
From there we moved to Niagara-on-the-Lake Ontario. NOTL is a quaint and beautiful village that swells with tourists each year. This was a place of healing for us. In that safe environment we were able to more fully unpack the wounds we’d received and the wounds we’d unintentionally inflicted on people we love. We were able to process our feelings and recommit our hearts to serving the Lord. We loved it there, but sensed the Lord was calling our family back into church planting, so we moved again and joined a group of people preparing to plant what is now Harvest Bible Chapel Brantford.
This is the place where we’ve really seen what ministry can be like – and should be like – when all people seek the Lord first. We’ve been blessed to serve the Lord alongside a core group of people who frequently set aside their personal preferences for the sake of unity, who forgive easily, and love generously. I struggled with our decision to leave NOTL and church plant again, but looking back, I am so thankful that my stubborn heart yielded. This hasn’t been an easy ministry (because ministry is rarely easy) but it has been so good.
- Did you have any particular areas of ministry in which you served in your church and community and what led you to those decisions?
Answer: I’ve served in every possible area of ministry, but I don’t say that proudly. It is to my shame. I did everything that was asked of me because a fear of man drove my choices. This was incredibly unhealthy. It took me years to understand that I am called to fear only God. It took years for me to clearly see the unique ways in which God has called me and equipped me to serve the body of Christ. There are always going to be people who believe I should do more, or do other things, but my heart now rests knowing that I answer to the Lord, not to the loudest voice in our church.
I consider my ministry to [my husband] Kevin my service to the church. When I care for our family and Kevin’s needs as God has directed me, Kevin is better equipped and free to serve the people in our church. So serving Kevin is really serving them.
- What has been one of your greatest challenges in this ministry context and how did you persevere in it? What did God teach you through it?
Answer: The greatest challenge has been learning that every yes contains a no. We cannot do everything well. When I scrambled to do the bidding of every loud voice in our church, my family received my leftover time, energy, and love. I wrote about this in my book, Glorious Surrender. “I was blind to the pride in my heart that believed sheer determination and people pleasing could produce spiritual results that please God… Achieving became an effort-based task dependent on my ability. If I worked hard enough, I should produce results. I removed God from my efforts and later wondered at my exhaustion and frustration… If I had worked as diligently on pleasing God as I did on pleasing others those early years could have been very different.”
If you could give a piece of advice to other rural and small-town pastors’ wives, what would it be and why?
Answer: “Our whole lives, which include ministry, family, dreams and desires for the future, are for the glory of God. If we serve Him for any other reason, disappointment will destroy us. Until His glory is our purpose, until His will is our desire, until all we want is what He wants, it will cost too much. It will be too hard. It will cut too deep.” (from “Glorious Surrender” by Stacey Weeks.)
Be sure to join us for our reading challenge this fall as we go through Stacey’s book together, and enjoy reading more about Stacey and her heart for ministry through her website on this link: https://staceyweeks.com/my-personal-ministry-statement/ .
