HOMESCHOOLING TIPS FOR PASTORS’ WIVES

Homeschooling as a pastor’s wife can be challenging if your congregation doesn’t fully understand what you’re up to. I remember in our first (rural) church I would diligently set my children up for school each morning and the phone would ring. I’d smile at the kids and then remind myself to be patient as I answered. The same lady. Every day. I’d feel guilty letting the phone go to voicemail, as if I was neglecting my first duty. 

After a while I realized that this lady didn’t really want anything more than to chit chat. Nothing was pressing or urgent. After finally realizing that this was a pattern, I was able to tell her that I tried very hard to get my kids’ school done in the morning (they were much younger then, so we could finish school in the morning) and that I’d love to chat in the afternoons while the kids were playing and the baby was napping. 

As challenging as that season was, I learned a few homeschooling tips that I believe will be helpful for you as a pastor’s wife who homeschools. Throughout the years, I’ve encountered other scenarios that make homeschooling as a ministry family challenging, but not impossible:

• The crisis counseling situation that suddenly presents itself
• Hospital emergencies
• A family in need of a meal
• Someone who needs to talk
• And many, many other situations I could have never imagined! 

Homeschooling when the congregation needs you just takes a little bit of creativity and some foresight and preparation. Although the life of a ministry family might make homeschooling a little more challenging, with a few tips, you can make homeschooling as a pastor’s wife a little bit easier. 

These tips are of course, barring the unthinkable and crisis situations that come up for ministry families (because sometimes you do just need to drop everything for a congregant in need – although beware of that one too. Some congregants always seem to have a crisis! 🙂 )

Let’s get started!

Gently Inform Your Congregation that You Homeschool

First, it’s important to communicate your plans to homeschool to your congregation. Sometimes just a little bit of knowledge will go a long way. For the most part, people will respect the fact that you homeschool and will try to give you the time you need. There are always those people who need a little more “training”!

Remember Your First Ministry is to Your Family

There’s a lot of pressure as a pastor’s wife and while I love being married to the pastor, I’ve often reminded myself that my first ministry is to care for my husband and the kids. Since our family has chosen to homeschool, I’m honoring my husband by being faithful to the job set before me, which is to teach my kids at home.

This of course, doesn’t excuse me from serving in the church, but it does mean that it’s ok to spend my time faithfully homeschooling the kids and making that the priority. When you homeschool, your first priority is to your kids and the education you’re giving them. Just don’t forget to serve in some capacity in the church. 

Homeschooling is Actually Real School!

I’ve seen an interesting trend amongst people who don’t homeschool. That is that they tend to think that homeschooling isn’t for real. And as funny as that sounds, it just takes a little educating (sorry, bad pun!) to help them understand that you are indeed, teaching your kids. Maybe just give a gentle reminder to the people in your church that although you are teaching your kids at home, it does constitute as real school.

I’ve found that once people in the congregation understand, they are far more likely to respect your time and allow you the ability to teach your kiddos at home without interrupting unless it’s urgent. (And in that case, you’ll need to be willing to help out with whatever the need is.)

Set Actual Homeschooling Hours

I’ve found it very helpful to have a clear homeschooling schedule so that the people in my congregation can know and respect the schedule. Consider setting a schedule for your own homeschool. Most people are more than happy to let you carry on with your day, when they know you’ll be available at some point. Which leads me to my next point…

Be Sure to be Available at Select Times

Make sure that you do take time to be available for people. As easy as it is to get caught up in teaching your children, you do need to make sure and set aside time for those in your church. 

Although “pastor’s wife” isn’t necessarily a position in the church, it is biblical to show hospitality as a ministry family. Therefore, it would be nice if the people in your congregation knew they could have you at certain times during the week. 

Keep Your Phone Out of Reach While School is in Session

This is by far, the most practical piece of advice I could give you. If your phone is close to you, you will use it! Trust me!

Before I started leaving my phone plugged into the wall in the kitchen, I would often find myself distracted with texts and phone calls. I find it much easier to check my phone on break or at lunch and then make a list of things that need to be handled when I’m finished teaching the kids. 

Leave Room for Some Flexibility

As much as you need to keep a good homeschooling schedule, it’s also important not to lose your heart for your ministry. Homeschooling requires a constant state of giving, therefore, it’s easy to get burnt out. 

Remember that the joy of serving in a church is the ability to help out with those ministry opportunities that present themselves. 

Plan Regular Getaways with Your Husband

You should do this whether you homeschool or not! But it’s especially important for a homeschooling pastor’s wife. When your kids are home with you all day long, it’s more difficult to find time for the two of you to refresh as a couple. 

Homeschooling and Being a Pastor’s Wife Doesn’t have to be Difficult

With time and discipline, you can find a way to balance the responsibilities that come with being a pastor’s wife and homeschooling your children. Don’t give up when it gets tough. Just remember that each of these tasks is a privilege to be able to serve. Keep tweaking your routine until you get it!

If you would like to check out other tips for homeschooling, you can check out my book, The Homeschooling Housewife, Juggling it All, One Priority at a Time